Irish Taxi Forum

Public Area => Taxi Talk => Topic started by: john m on March 20, 2021, 11:29:28 pm

Title: Coronasomnia
Post by: john m on March 20, 2021, 11:29:28 pm
Im out buying more gargle and I bump into Pudden and his new Bird .I havent seen Pudden in years .He tells me he isint sleeping great due to Coronasomnia .he says its a thing because your life is upside down you dont sleep properly I said I agree I dont sleep more than 3 hours a night and take a nap on the sofa during the Day .He says you need to get back into a routine .I ask how can I do that the bookies is closed the pub is closed and Mick wont fly me to Tenerife .Anyway his bird asks why do you call him Pudden he jumps in and says because when he was a kid he robbed me Mas Christmas pudden and eat it .I didnt say anything but thats not the reason Bernie Hogan from the Gaffs near the flats dropped her hand on him when he was about 15 she was 18 and she said he had a Mickey shaped like a Pudden .He said she meant it was huge but she said it was tiny and had a big curve in it like a Pudden .He had to get circumsised to straighten it up .Lucky it wasent Big Dommo they bumped into he calls him Topless .
Title: Re: Coronasomnia
Post by: Octavia1 on March 21, 2021, 02:23:28 am
High blood pressure  can cause insomnia ....or a mind than never sleeps ....I call mine Manhattan.....me ma calls me madhatter  ??? :-X
Title: Re: Coronasomnia
Post by: Dr. Martin Gooter Bling on March 21, 2021, 05:20:36 am
didje know that around 90% of males in America are circumcised.
I'm still in a stayra shock over that.
I always thought that it was just all the hardline jew heads with the beards and the Amish lookin gear that were in to it.
barbaric carry on in my book.
Title: Re: Coronasomnia
Post by: Cool Boola on March 21, 2021, 10:14:48 am
Your ACTING the prick now
Title: Re: Coronasomnia
Post by: silverbullet on March 21, 2021, 12:21:00 pm
High blood pressure  can cause insomnia ....or a mind than never sleeps ....I call mine Manhattan.....me ma calls me madhatter  ??? :-X
Off your Rockefeller!
Title: Re: Coronasomnia
Post by: stonethecrows on March 21, 2021, 02:01:44 pm
A doctor has been doing circumcisions for 30 years, and he's collected all the foreskins.

He has them all in a box, and decides he should do something with them. He takes them to a taxidermist and asks him to make something out of them.

A few weeks later, he returns to the taxidermist, who pulls out a small box and sets it on the counter. The doctor opens the box and there is a wallet. "I brought you all those foreskins, and all you could make is a wallet?"

"That's not just any wallet," says the taxidermist. "Rub it and it turns into a suitcase!"
Title: Re: Coronasomnia
Post by: silverbullet on March 21, 2021, 03:22:13 pm
didje know that around 90% of males in America are circumcised.
I'm still in a stayra shock over that.
I always thought that it was just all the hardline jew heads with the beards and the Amish lookin gear that were in to it.
barbaric carry on in my book.
Himdi men aren't circumcised.  When they are at war with Pakistan they simply make the prisoners drop their pants, a circumcised penis gets  you killed.
Title: Re: Coronasomnia
Post by: Dr. Martin Gooter Bling on March 21, 2021, 04:00:03 pm
it must be standard procedure in every hospital in America after they cut the umbilical chord they slice in to the little babby's mickey. you would'nt think that hocus pocus third world bollocks would be entertained en masse. why aren't they having a go at female genitalias as well if this is the case. dreadful carry on.
Title: Re: Coronasomnia
Post by: Bob Shillin on March 21, 2021, 04:22:06 pm
Apparently it's more hygenic to have the top of the penis exposed to the air, no little places for smells, and bacteria to linger. Makes one's dick less sensitive also,........ helps one last longer, if one has a problem in that area.
Title: Re: Coronasomnia
Post by: Dr. Martin Gooter Bling on March 21, 2021, 04:42:29 pm
when have you ever heard anybody in your life say i can't wash my bollocks properly i think I'll have to chop in to it to feed the soap round it properly.
Title: Re: Coronasomnia
Post by: silverbullet on March 21, 2021, 07:17:24 pm
it must be standard procedure in every hospital in America after they cut the umbilical chord they slice in to the little babby's mickey. you would'nt think that hocus pocus third world bollocks would be entertained en masse. why aren't they having a go at female genitalias as well if this is the case. dreadful carry on.
Google FGM.
Title: Re: Coronasomnia
Post by: markmiwurdz on March 21, 2021, 07:25:25 pm
when have you ever heard anybody in your life say i can't wash my bollocks properly i think I'll have to chop in to it to feed the soap round it properly.

It's all a load of bollocks...
Title: Re: Coronasomnia
Post by: Dr. Martin Gooter Bling on March 21, 2021, 07:44:03 pm
it must be standard procedure in every hospital in America after they cut the umbilical chord they slice in to the little babby's mickey. you would'nt think that hocus pocus third world bollocks would be entertained en masse. why aren't they having a go at female genitalias as well if this is the case. dreadful carry on.
Google FGM.

yes but 90% of yank women don't have their bits and pieces mutilated like the men do.
Title: Re: Coronasomnia
Post by: stonethecrows on March 21, 2021, 08:59:06 pm
Apparently it's more hygenic to have the top of the penis exposed to the air, no little places for smells, and bacteria to linger. Makes one's dick less sensitive also,........ helps one last longer, if one has a problem in that area.
Is there an upper age limit for a male to have this done ? , just asking for a friend.
Title: Re: Coronasomnia
Post by: Dr. Martin Gooter Bling on March 21, 2021, 09:07:14 pm
just dump a tin of lynx africa down the front of your jocks like tony does.
Title: Re: Coronasomnia
Post by: Shallowhal on March 21, 2021, 10:39:06 pm
just dump a tin of lynx africa down the front of your jocks like tony does.

But Tony has the top of it taped down.....it's chloroform and anaesthesia all in one....they don't remember anything...he don't feel fukall!!