Big Dommo rang me asked if I had any coin that I wanted to invest in his Christmas venture to make drinking vouchers for the festive season so I dropped down with Cheap Aldi Cider and a big bag of mixed Nuts and a cake .His idea was to sell Mistletoe around the doors .Now I have known Big Dommo for ever and Im thinking the lockdown has not been kind to him it obviously has effected his mind .Door to door selling in a pandemic sure nobody would open the door and if they did they would give you a mouthfull of abuse and on top of that who is going to be kissing strangers under the Mistletoe anyway .That was last Thursday when I left there was three black bin bags full of Mistletoe in the spare bedroom where the Scalectric set is usually kept for when we play Grand prix .Billy the Bastard is the reigning champion in the 16 pints or over Championship best drunk driver ive ever seen and he dosent even own a car or a licence but Scalectric he is shit hot .He is also the reigning 24 hour drunk driver champion or at least he says he won it the rest of us were pissed and fell asleep anyway nobody cared the prize was only Six bottles of Pissie Pils from Lidil .Anyway back to Big Dommos mental breakdown and the Mistletoe Crisis of 2020 .He sent for me last night said bring a bow saw .I got to the flats about 6oc and Big Dommo hands me back the score I invested in the Mistletoe Franchise .I said to him hold on to it buy a cylinder of gas for the Super Ser keep you warm for Christmas .I knew he was a few quid out of pocket that he payed Sally Mulligans youngfella for collecting the Mistletoe .No said Dommo a deal is a deal and he hands me back me score and forty five more notes ."Whats the Story "I asked .Well sais Dommo you were right nobody would buy stuff off you at the door so I had a load of plastic bags I was recycling in the cupboard in the hall so I put a bunch of mistletoe in each of them and got young Doreen O loughlin to hang a bag off of everybodies door knob and I put a note in with the Mistletoe wishing everybody a happy Christmas and asking for a donation to buy a Christmas Tree to be put up in the Playground in the Flats only Old Tony the Bollox on the Bottom didnt give something .So I went to the wholesalers and bought a big box of broken decorations but we will get enough good stuff out of it to do the tree and if there is any left over we can raffle it .What did you want the Bow Saw for I asked .He just said Billy Flynn hadnt got one I dont know what he meant but sixty five euro in me pocket .Dommo bought the Cheap Lidil Cider and a Multipack of Crisps Billy Flynn brought back the Bow Saw after dark and when I was leaving the flats at about half two this morning Billy must of borrowed a shovel as well I seen him digging a hole in the sandpit in the playground and planting a huge Christmas Tree .Im cycling home up the Long Mile road with me Bow Saw over me shoulder singing Christmas songs to meself and I was just thinking Christmas Tree ,Cheap Cider ,Mistletoe ,Bow Saw ,Shovel Broken Decorations .24 pack of Crisps Cake ,Peanuts Cheap Polish piss Lager A nice Christmas Story .I wonder could I sell this story to Lidil or Aldi for next years Christmas Add .
