The Perfect Taxi App

[Taxi driver42]

do you reckon driverless taxis will ever happen john.
do you ever see those autonomous robot vacuums.
Brilliant fuckin idea. One problem though.
You need to live in a palace with no fuckin furniture for the yoke to work.
Creating a solution nobody asked for to a problem that does'nt exist.

Robots will do everything soon
Im waiting for the bkade runner ones
The fabulous looking sex worker ones so ill buy one of them teach it how toom cook and sack the wife
Na
Fuck the cooking il use lets eat

[Rat Catcher]

I think Hail0 raised around stg£100,000,000. When it was rescued by Daimler it hadn't a pot to piss in.

At best UWs project could succeed, at worst it could cause Daimler to put another few hundred thousand euros in taxi drivers' pockets via vouchers. Erm, you already cost drivers a small fortune by advising Bill Cullen not to invest in our trade. No doubt you were well rewarded for that.

[The Liffey Lip]

Going to do you a favour here U .I am for my sins and Economist so I will give you the economics of a taxi app .It is revenue neutral eg UBER have never made a profit and if you check out Mytaxi revenue returns I doubt they have ever made a profit .

 Like you take out insurance against an accident what the taxi apps are doing is taking out insurance against driverless cars .Mytaxi will reinvest any profits into vouchers and bonus payments for drivers all they are doing is building up a data bank just in case driver less cars ever become popular they WILL NOT .

  I will give you an example of why it will never happen .When they invented the microwave everybody thought that that was the end of cooking ,go into your local supermarket and compare how many ingredients are for sale and how many microwave ready meals are on sale people like to cook and drivers like to drive .There is no profit in a taxi app as that is not why they were invented .

Do yourself a favour and rethink your project this is a bottle of smoke what you think you are seeing is not what exists .

If the microwave could turn itself on and off it would be the end of cooking. The primary reason for the multitude of ingredients in shops is product diversification to stop brands becoming obsolete. There are 5 takeaways in every rural village and restaurants cannot fill chef positions....and people are cooking? Driverless cars will happen John, probably long after we're dead from TV dinners and the like, but it's as sure as men will want their flutes sucked by anyone other than the one kissing their kids.
The reason for this is not down to consumer choice but rather not having one due to Govt policies. 2/3's of adults over 55 are medicated in Ireland...that figure will match the U.S.A's one of near 80% in time. We're constantly being told by Govt Quangos and agencies that we're not fit to tie our own laces... a la the AA's catchphrase regarding mobiles"not while you're driving" and "remember to turn your fog lights off while on the hard shoulder masturbating".
At every hands turn they are insisting men and women who've been doing jobs for yrs be retrained in the same job in order to obtain a certificate to prove they're fit to do the very job they were doing before they had to take a day off to sit the test.

Surprised you can't see that we're being shoved to one side.

[john m]

Driverless Cars will be invented that is certain but the public including todays kids who are breastfed on TV and tablet and mothered by digital download wont want them .People are waking up to Big Data where everything you do or say is recorded somewhere by someone .I doubt the computing capability exists to run a billion self drive cars at once doing nano calculations to operate the vehicles .FFS Mytaxi cant even get their app to work and you cant livestream a match without it freezing .Auto Pilot is a great example it can fly and land the plane but passengers would not get on to a plane without a Pilot Although it would be safe and Mickie O would introduce it in the morning .The car has become a symbol of freedom a way to get around it is an enabler .I cannot see people willingly giving up that freedom and unless every car is running with the same programme I can never see the day when they will be viable .Most of the tech that has been developed for driverless cars will be incorporated into electric or hydrogen powered cars .In newbuild cities built on a grid system Driverless cars might work but I can never see one picking up Pancho and his bird from Finches .Another HUGE risk for driverless cars is they would be vulnerable to being hacked .

 Driverless Cars and Drones doing deliveries are pipedreams pushed by Amazon, another company that has never made a profit to drive up its share price so they can sell shares as that is where they make their money selling shares in a mythical future .

[The Liffey Lip]

John, I guarantee you there were 2 fellas chewing the fat like us before the Battles of the Somme and Marne, both on horses laughing at the prospect of this big, ugly yoke with wheels and chains doing away with the need for cavaliers. One of them smoking a Woodbine, s[]ing at the officer's appraisal of this machine, the other laughing at the fella lighting a woodbine with a match because he had heard the same thing about the lighter never taking off.

Anyway...cooking....

https://www.bloomberg.com/news/articles/2017-10-03/easyjet-founder-set-to-launch-just-eat-rival-easyfood


George Osborne's driverless trucks thingy was a load of bollix so you're probably right..

Breaking the unions is what this is all about. No harm having a laugh at the whole thing........So why is George Osborne so interested in this technology? One possibility is that he considers it a way of weakening two of the last remaining bastions of union power: lorry and taxi drivers. Another is that he hopes it will provide a boost for the UK car manufacturing industry. Either way, the revolution, when it comes, will not be driverless. 

[john m]

If our friend U wants to invent an app then invent a Spare Plate App .Everybody eats but not everybody has time to cook .Mrs Mary Margaret O Leary a housewife mother home keeper of 2 Mulligan Street Dublin 26 is a grand cook on wednesday she makes her husbands favourite Mince Stew .If she gets a larger pot she can make more .Now Raymond Gilhooley works for some  aDriverless Car development company his department are working on self smelling air fresheners for the Driverless cars any hoo none of that matters .He lives in one of those new single person residential pods they just built on the main Road .Now he dosent like cooking as it smells up his pod and the bang of boiling cabbage off his douvet puts his boyfriend off sex .So Mary Margret offers two plates of stew for sale on the Spare Plate App Raymond looks at her Star rating and purchases the food he collects it from her Gaff in thermal containers and brings it home and serves it .He gets a hot meal Mary Margret gets an earner and tomorrow Raymond will look on the app for something Appatising for dinner .

 Now Raymond might use Mytaxi or UBER or Lyft to hail his taxi as they already exist but unlike lets eat there is no app that allows a person with an extra portion of food to sell it to the public .The attraction of Spare Plate the Food app is it does and will have a big environmental impact in reducing food waste .

 I appreciate that U is carrying out an academic exercise but why waste your time reinventing the wheel when Spare Plate might actually work and make you some coin .

[The Liffey Lip]

do you reckon driverless taxis will ever happen john.
do you ever see those autonomous robot vacuums.
Brilliant fuckin idea. One problem though.
You need to live in a palace with no fuckin furniture for the yoke to work.
Creating a solution nobody asked for to a problem that does'nt exist.

Robots will do everything soon
Im waiting for the bkade runner ones
The fabulous looking sex worker ones so ill buy one of them teach it how toom cook and sack the wife
Na
Fuck the cooking il use lets eat

Forget the autonomous robot vacuum cleaner.......that's not the threat to Mama Rotundo losing her part-time gig cleaning at Pat's Psychiatric. The robot using her Henry the Hoover is the threat. And as for cooking the slow cooker is the best thing ever...put your chicken chasseur on at 11pm and it's ready to go at 8am and cheap as fuck on the lecky.

[john m]

Now theres a thing that done away with the whole sense of community and family.The remote control you just lie on the sofa and press the button to change the channel .It has destroyed family life .Remember when you got her or the kids to jump up or run down the stairs to change from the BBC over to Channel 4 so you could watch all the races.You communicated with her and the kids ,now they leave you slouched on the couch while they mess about with their phone or her in doors is on facebook sharing gossip and scandal with the bingo crowd .

[Rat Catcher]

I don't understand why you are so against competition in the app sector, erm. I imagine you were well paid in your capacity as adviser to Bill Cullen but UW has already told you he has nothing to give you.

While the provision of autonomous vehicles may be the ultimate objective for motor manufacturers, there will be self drive options along the way. Their focus is shifting from selling motor cars to selling efficient utilisation of motor cars. I think it was one of Daimler's Brand CEOs that coined the phrase Airbnb on wheels. The taxi trade certainly has a role to play for the foreseeable future provided we can provide a service that is fit for purpose. That is probably best achieved by working with the multinationals, blind opposition to everything they do or propose certainly won't get us anywhere.

[Shallowhal]

or her in doors is on facebook sharing gossip and scandal with the bingo crowd .


Probably discussing how to get out of that loveless marriage!!

[john m]

{I don't understand why you are so against competition in the app sector, erm.}Simple Rodent the less of them there are the greater power drivers have to leave If Mytaxi control 40% of the market they might think they control the drivers but in fact we can control them by leaving  and destroy their business and they know this .In a more fragmented market our influence is diluted .

[Shallowhal]

As long as they keep throwin Samsung S7's and All For One(one for all) vouchers at drivers...they'll always have monkeys!!

[Rat Catcher]

{I don't understand why you are so against competition in the app sector, erm.}Simple Rodent the less of them there are the greater power drivers have to leave If Mytaxi control 40% of the market they might think they control the drivers but in fact we can control them by leaving  and destroy their business and they know this .In a more fragmented market our influence is diluted .

At least you have a theory. However, one firm dominating the trade is not a good thing. We have seen Uber increase commission rates in markets it dominates and mytaxi has tried to do the same in Germany. Even at 12% commission the work is very expensive. We need the bonuses to redress the balance. More competition ought to result in more bonuses. Remember we are now dealing with firms that are armed with blank cheques, surely it makes sense for us to encourage them to fill them in at will.

[U Wha]

Lads I am preparing a driver survey to publish on website,facebook page etc.

The topic is the ideal taxi app (for drivers).

Any suggestions on what taxi drivers should be asked in trying to identify what a driver wants out of an app and what would make them join/support it would be appreciated.

[Rat Catcher]

Personally, I'd keep it as simple as:

- Simple, intuitive UI.
- Google Maps based.
- Full fare.
- Max 2 mins free waiting time, no free waiting time for pub/disco pick ups.
- Set price per job - not commission based.
- Maximum weekly freight i.e. capped.