Author Topic: Strangest call you ever got.  (Read 928 times)

Offline taxi1990

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Strangest call you ever got.
« on: January 23, 2023, 10:39:55 am »
Some stranger rang me once and asked me how to go about passing the SPSV entry test.

I told them to ring the NTA and ask them.

Offline Rat Catcher

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Re: Strangest call you ever got.
« Reply #1 on: January 23, 2023, 11:30:31 am »
I always tell them to do the Free Now course. I think they get a grand (probably credit against future freight) if they pass. It seems madness to have such a difficult test for new entrants while letting incumbents continue with relatively little or no knowledge. That was that mean and nasty lady, Kathleen Doyle, who introduced that. Give it back to the Gardai, I say!

Offline watty

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Re: Strangest call you ever got.
« Reply #2 on: January 23, 2023, 05:38:45 pm »
Got a call about 2am whilst I was fast asleep.  When I answered, he rudely asked me who I was?  I replied he should know because he phoned me.  We went back and forth a few times like this until, I dunno why, I said I was a taxi driver.  Then there was a bit of silence and he hung up.

Thinking about it later, I think he used my phone to phone his girlfriend earlier in the day and, 12 paranoid hours later, saw my number on her phone and thought something dodgy was going on.

The only dodgy thing about the whole affair was his taxi journey - selling a fake rolex to an unsuspecting punter!

Offline Rat Catcher

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Re: Strangest call you ever got.
« Reply #3 on: January 23, 2023, 06:00:53 pm »
Shoulda told him you're a black lad with exceptionally large extremities.

I'd say most folk can spot a fake Rolex these days... unless it's a particularly good one with the correct movement. There is a strong enough market for replicas.

Offline taxi1990

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Re: Strangest call you ever got.
« Reply #4 on: January 23, 2023, 09:13:51 pm »
I always tell them to do the Free Now course. I think they get a grand (probably credit against future freight) if they pass. It seems madness to have such a difficult test for new entrants while letting incumbents continue with relatively little or no knowledge. That was that mean and nasty lady, Kathleen Doyle, who introduced that. Give it back to the Gardai, I say!


Next time I will drop over my notes to them and give them area knowledge grinds.

Offline Cool Boola

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Re: Strangest call you ever got.
« Reply #5 on: January 24, 2023, 01:50:40 am »
I wonder where my good friend Kathleen Doyle is now…..I miss her so much!
Dis an Dat Im not a rat

Offline Belker

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Re: Strangest call you ever got.
« Reply #6 on: January 24, 2023, 07:56:33 am »
Excerpt from Taxi Diaries 2.
Valentines night 2017;

I pick up a young/middle aged couple going home on a fare about Midnight,
all is not good, she barks her destination at me and then there is an
Icy silence in the cab with a Thunder and Lightning kinda atmosphere.
I'm guessing that their Valentines night plans did not go according to plan,
but I keep me gob shut as is my job.

Along the way a Russian Taxi colleague of mine, a Big Bald Stocky lad
ex Russian military rings me as I have the Two customers in the car, I take
the call and it goes straight to the bluetooth loudspeaker, my extremely
drunk Russian friend comes on the line slurring in a very distinct Russian accent;
"Hi Ken, this Vaz, ....I need taxi, I'm in..........
I'm.............. Fook !, ....Ken need taxi you collect me ?.."
"We drink little vodka, I little bit drunk........................
Fook !..... OK, I need taxi home..............Fook ! ...........
Where I am ........ I'm in Northside, can you collect me ?
....Fook !.... Where am I ?.....I don't know where I am......
...................I get address, ....I ring you back..... Fook !........."


With that all said (And that's the Shortened version) he hangs up.
My male customer in the front seat lets loose and laughs out loud,
the lady in the back is holding her hand to her mouth trying to conceal
her fit of laughter. The lady on arriving at her home says to me;
"That's the best taxi ride ever, that's made my Valentines night" !

Offline Cool Boola

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Re: Strangest call you ever got.
« Reply #7 on: January 24, 2023, 10:26:22 am »
Thats a good story Ken. When is the book coming out?
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Offline taxi1990

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Re: Strangest call you ever got.
« Reply #8 on: January 24, 2023, 10:40:22 am »
Got a call about 2am whilst I was fast asleep.  When I answered, he rudely asked me who I was?  I replied he should know because he phoned me.  We went back and forth a few times like this until, I dunno why, I said I was a taxi driver.  Then there was a bit of silence and he hung up.

Thinking about it later, I think he used my phone to phone his girlfriend earlier in the day and, 12 paranoid hours later, saw my number on her phone and thought something dodgy was going on.

The only dodgy thing about the whole affair was his taxi journey - selling a fake rolex to an unsuspecting punter!


I get them calls as well, "who is this?" in a really accusing tone. I say you called me. I usually drag it out for a while then say im a taxi driver.

Offline Belker

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Re: Strangest call you ever got.
« Reply #9 on: January 24, 2023, 12:13:08 pm »
Thats a good story Ken. When is the book coming out?
Maybe the second edition might be published someday, (as I have it all written), but prob when I'm incapacitated in some hospital ward or nursing home with Fook all else to do, and access to a computer.

Offline Shallow Hal

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Re: Strangest call you ever got.
« Reply #10 on: January 24, 2023, 01:06:44 pm »
Thats a good story Ken. When is the book coming out?
Maybe the second edition might be published someday, (as I have it all written), but prob when I'm incapacitated in some hospital ward or nursing home with Fook all else to do, and access to a computer.

Just don't be incapacitated in Mercy Hospital with some fruitcake being held on a general ward!!

Offline Rat Catcher

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Re: Strangest call you ever got.
« Reply #11 on: January 24, 2023, 09:53:32 pm »
Next time I will drop over my notes to them and give them area knowledge grinds.

No need. There's lads studying with Free Now all over Afghanistan, Pakistan, India, Bangladesh and beyond who pass the test within 3 hours of first setting foot in the country.

Offline taxi1990

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Re: Strangest call you ever got.
« Reply #12 on: January 24, 2023, 10:16:08 pm »
Next time I will drop over my notes to them and give them area knowledge grinds.

No need. There's lads studying with Free Now all over Afghanistan, Pakistan, India, Bangladesh and beyond who pass the test within 3 hours of first setting foot in the country.



This was an Irish Thicko who rang me.

Offline Rat Catcher

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Re: Strangest call you ever got.
« Reply #13 on: January 24, 2023, 10:33:48 pm »
Well, if lads who can't speak ENGLISH can pass with Free Now I'm sure he'd stand a good, perhaps even better than average, chance.... and sending him to them saves you from mentoring him.

Offline taxi1990

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Re: Strangest call you ever got.
« Reply #14 on: January 24, 2023, 10:37:05 pm »
Well, if lads who can't speak ENGLISH can pass with Free Now I'm sure he'd stand a good, perhaps even better than average, chance.... and sending him to them saves you from mentoring him.


Foreign people tend to put the work in if they want something in my experience, where as Paddy usually doesn't and wants things easy and handed to him.

 


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