DID YOU HEAR THIS BOLLOXOLOGY

[Shallowhal]

Whats the Story if I go to Lidil to buy Gargle tins of beans can I buy a Diving Suit and A 32 piece Jigsaw puzzle .?

Course ye can John....jigsaw puzzle is for your mental health and the diving suit is for when you're ridin the missus!!

[TheDevilHimself]

Will that pesky curve ever get flattened ?

[dalymount]

More chance of flattening me bleedin wasteline

[Rat Catcher]

I have a 318 piece jigsaw puzzle you can have a go at, erm!

[john m]

Leo out in the Jacks having a slash in the Dail while some other TDs have a smoke or do a line .He says to the oulone pissing in the cubicle beside him ."We need to lock down the country to stop the health service being over run with the Dizzzzzeeeeeze " Yer one says Taoiseach number Two we need to close the airports to stop possible Dizzzzeeeezed whores coming into the country" .A ta Fuck No " Said Taoiseach Number two .We need to IMPORT people suffering from the fever into the country .IMPORT yes said Taoiseach Number Two ....The Government is ready for any request from Northern Ireland authorities to transfer patients suffering from Covid-19 to ICU beds.

No request has been made but north-south contacts are intensifying as the situation in Northern Ireland worsens.

However, there is a view that such a request would be a major symbolic step for some parties in the Northern executive so they may be reluctant to go down that route.

There have been 722 positive Covid-19 cases recorded in the North in the past 24 hours, bringing the overall total to 35,554...YOU REALLY COULDNT MAKE THIS SHIT UP .

[john m]

HERE CUNT I WANT YA said the Minister to the School Principle DUMP THAT FUCKIN POISON HAND WASHING SHIT and buy more different stuff .HERE CUNT I WANT YA AGAIN said the Minister to the School Principle U remember the shit I told you to buy now DUMP THAT SHIT AS WELL ....

SCHOOLS have been told to stop using another 52 sanitisation products that were supposed to stop the spread of Covid-19, following the recall of the Virapro hand gel last week.

The Department of Education has told principals that there is no evidence that the products are unsafe .

But, it says it "has not been possible to satisfactorily confirm their registration status" as part of the review.

The move will come as a shock to principals and boards of management who are preparing to reopen on Monday.

As well as schools, other areas of the public service will also be affected, although members of the public are not being asked to dispose of product already in their possession.

“People are, however advised to ensure that future purchases must have a clearly visible PCS or IE-BPA or EU number on the label, “ the Department of Agricultre has advised

Anybody think this is bollox so the Schools have an excuse not to open without saying its Covid related but Safety related .

[Shallowhal]

Just piss on yer hands....or get some good lookin burd from the flats to golden shower yer hands....and a quick handjob!!

[john m]

Just piss on yer hands....or get some good lookin burd from the flats to golden shower yer hands....and a quick handjob!!

I remember Betty Muddyman from the Flats when she was about 17 Big Dommos Brother was giving the boatman in her Canoe a little tiddle and she pissed on his hand with excitement .He went home and washed his hands with Disinfectant his oulone robbed from from the Place she worked .We were not in the EEC back then so there was no number or anything on the bottle of Disinfectant and Dommo never got any sort of rash or anything from using it .

[Shallowhal]

Probably get a rash quicker of Betty Muddyman.

[markmiwurdz]

I remember Betty Muddyman from the Flats when she was about 17 Big Dommos Brother was giving the boatman in her Canoe a little tiddle and she pissed on his hand with excitement .

Often mistaken for female cum.....

[john m]

Most face masks to protect against coronavirus do not meet standards
Consumers told to look for ‘SWiFT 19’ approval mark on any masks they buy..HERE CUNTS GET INTO WORK AND COVER YOUR GOB .Teachers union will be all over this .Is there any fucking thing they got right .I doubt this Government could get the colour of shite right even if you gave them Three Guesses .

[Shallowhal]

They'd need more than three guesses to get the colur of my shite right....

[Cool Boola]

Browned off

[Dr. Martin Gooter Bling]

the masks don't work so in other words, cunts have been makin cunts of themselves while makin cunts of themselves.

[stonethecrows]

So I caught my girlfriend masturbating with a carrot.

My first reaction was “Shit, I was gonna eat that later, but now it’s gonna taste like carrots!”