Waiting fer Plod ?

[Belker]

I had a fare last night 12.30am, 3 drunk auld yokes all going Southside.
Togher, Wilton and Ballincollig I was told, and I reckoned it would come in at about €40.

The conversation in the cab was a tad raunchy, but I held my silence.
Many times I was referred to as 'Mr MeGoo' but I held stum.

We dropped the first lady off in Togher who paid nothing toward the fare,
and then after she left the other 2 slated her fer not handing up any money.

[John m]

Did you not get Coined ?

[Belker]

After the first lady left without paying anything the other 2 were in a discomforted mood.
Every turn I took was met with; "If ya went the other way it would be faster".

With me eventually asking at the next junction which way they would like to go,
I got no answer, but again the "If ya went the other way it would be faster" comments continued
AFTER I had made the turn.

The conversation in the back of the cab was Lewd in the extreme and quite often I was referenced,
but I held my tongue.

[John m]

Did you get paid ?

[Horse]

Takes Ken a few posts to get the one story out John. Hopefully he wasn't ripped.

[Belker]

As we start to approach the 2nd ladies house in Wilton with 17 odd on the meter, one of them states;
"I'm only paying you Twenty Euro and your gonna bring me to Ballincollig !".

So we drop the 2nd lady who was by far the most drunk of them all in Wilton, and again the 3rd lady starts with the only Twenty Euro bit, and by now there is €26 on the meter.

So I stop the cab outside where we dropped the 2nd lady and tell the last lady that she has 3 options.
1. Get out of the cab.
2. Pay the full fare and I will bring you home.
3. I will bring you to Togher Garda station and have you removed.

[John m]

And Jesus Fell Three Times as he carried his Cross .Did you Fucking Get Paid .Why you waiting for Plod or is Plod some sort of Cork Gibberish for Coin .FFS tell us the Fucking Punchline .

[Belker]

She argues forever stating that I took the long or wrong route and how dare I put her out 'In the middle of nowhere in the lashing rain'.

I told her; "I took the cheapest route that I could and your not in the 'middle of nowhere', you are outside your friends house, and please get out of my cab". (Without ever cursing or raising my voice).

Again she argues like a Banshee and I reiterate my Garda comment to coierce her out.

[Belker]

And Jesus Fell Three Times as he carried his Cross .Did you Fucking Get Paid .Why you waiting for Plod or is Plod some sort of Cork Gibberish for Coin .FFS tell us the Fucking Punchline .

Would you hold your Whist a while !
I'm getting there.

[John m]

THE END That was a lovely story Kenneth .

[Belker]

THE END That was a lovely story Kenneth .

No worries !

[Octavia1]

After the first lady left without paying anything the other 2 were in a discomforted mood.
Every turn I took was met with; "If ya went the other way it would be faster".

With me eventually asking at the next junction which way they would like to go,
I got no answer, but again the "If ya went the other way it would be faster" comments continued
AFTER I had made the turn.

The conversation in the back of the cab was Lewd in the extreme and quite often I was referenced,
but I held my tongue.

I had 2 cnuts like that in me car few yers ago .....me mental health wasn't great at the time.... again ....think i forgot me medication...an I floored it doin 120  up the Oscar trainer an slammed on the brakes at the guarda Station....the smell of shite  an screams off them ...
 Anyway ... it Worked a treat  ....
Jumped out like 2 kangderroos they did
Poor cnuts

[Belker]

THE END That was a lovely story Kenneth .

Was it You who once stated that if you have nothing to say, then best say nothing.
Thank you John M fer killing off my story half told. Congrats, you Won !

[Jack Meoff]

Could you finish it in your own section ?

[Shallow Hal]

Ah ffs.....I nearly climaxed there!!